Saturday, 18 May 2013 05:31

Why Don't Other Kids Like Me?

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Why Don’t Other Kids Like Me?




Making friends with other children can at times be a difficult process. Children like adults have trouble accepting other kids that are bossy, pushy, always focused on themselves and often cause problems for others. It is important to understand that kids like adults like sharing, kindness, rules when playing games as well as helping others.


Some children though are shy and find it hard to even talk to other kids all together. They may feel uncomfortable or anxious because they doubt themselves. This can be hard especially if they experience other children teasing them because they are different and don’t participate. Children in this situation need the support and the strength to know that they can feel confident and that everything will be OK in the end if they do the best they can to the best of their ability.







Bragging is behaviour that some children also exhibit It involves a child who struggles to fit in and thus over compensates by telling his/her peers how good he/she is. This type of behaviour rarelyworks as other children quickly realise how annoying the behaviour is.


Poor sportsmanship is the last example of children not fitting in as it usually involves a child who struggles socially getting upset when he/she loses in a sporting event. The behaviour involves arguing, cheating, shoving other kids or becoming upset when things don’t go his/her way.


So what can a child do if he/she displays some of these behaviours?


All of these behaviours centre around a particular skill set. Once you master this skill set you will be able to develop friendships and maintain them for the long term. This skill set is referred to as Developing Social Awareness and involves understanding how to cooperate, help others, share and resolve conflict. For example, if a child has poor sportsmanship skills it is important to develop skills around losing in a supportive and structured environment like

your own home. A child needs to start with "beat your own record" contests in a enjoyable activity, and then slowly work their way up to brief and then longer variety of competitive games. It is important to recognize that you can’t always win the game, but you can "have fun" by enjoying the company of your friends and peers.










It is also important to realise that kids like adults will form friendships with other kids that have things in common. The key is to find these common interests and then share these interests with others. This can be done by asking questions to your peers about things that they like doing and that they are good at. By doing this a child is building common ground and will soon notice an interest from others.


Helping others through kindness is a big winner for children trying to make friends. To do this you will need to think about ways one can be kind. The key is not to use money or buy gifts as true friends can’t be bought. It involves simple things like helping another child with a task they have to do or being friendly by smiling at a peer and asking them if they need when required.


By following these simple social techniques you will soon notice their popularity around others increasing. As long as you can stay honest and truthful, real friends will emerge and develop.





Reviewed by Kellie Bradbury M.ED. B.PSY    (Psychologist and Teacher)  


Read 3175 times Last modified on Monday, 28 September 2015 00:33

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